Did you get shocked by reading this title? Don't be because everyone goes through the ups and downs in their life. No one gives a fuck about what is happening in other peoples lives. It's you who has to take charge of your life and roll it like a boss.
So this failure is not a big failure compared to my past. I faced the worst failures than this. I think failure makes you stronger. This was just a failed attempt in one of the multiple races I ran in my life. So the story goes back to the time when I moved to the silicon valley of India, oh don't tell me now you don't know this place its Namma Bengaluru. Place where from far way looks as if everything is running fast but nothing runs fast not even Lamborghini. So I got a new opportunity in this city and just planned to move on with the flow. Suddenly an idea of participating in the Ladakh marathon came into my mind. I was already 3.35 finisher in Full Marathon so thought I might do my best because I had improved a lot on my half marathons. Without thinking anything I booked a ticket from Bangalore to Delhi and from Delhi to Leh. On their website, they had suggested arriving in Leh 2 weeks prior so that we can get well acclimatized. I did the same and simultaneously my preparations started. But I was not aware of the gif kept in the future. I started with the strength training in the evening and running in the morning. I applied all marathon running strategies
Milage running on weekends
Speed and alternate running on weekdays.
I would take just 1 days rest and that rest day also I would do Yoga so that I utilize myself fully.
Those were the days I was in PG. Believe me, the PG which I was staying in was one of the most horrible ones. I had just joined there because it had GYM and nothing else, Their food was worst, there was no proper space in the rooms even to move for a single person, also I met one of the stupid and irritating roommate over there who ate my energy like a zombie. I just wanted to run away from there. Finally, I found a shared apartment and was supposed to move in after a month. My preparation for the marathon was in full swing, But something was wrong. In this 2 months, I did not get my periods even once. I was concerned about it not sure what went wrong. I am not a type of a person who is in a relationship so the question of might be pregnant was out of my mind. still, I waited patiently by this time due to excessive mileage running my knee started painting terribly. I am not sure its runner's knee or ITB syndrome. I am still analyzing my knee problem and in search of a good physiotherapist. Soon it became 2.5 months without my periods, also I was putting body fat accessively even after exercising. This was really scary for me. I can tolerate anything but not putting on weight and body fat. by now reasons to get worried were piling up, ITB syndrome, periods not regular and body fat. Finally, my patience came to end and I decided to visit a doctor, a good gynecologist who will not judge me and give me good treatment.
The first question asked by a doctor when I told her my problem was Do you have a boyfriend? (She was one of the nice ladies I met) I was like If I had I would have never visited you. Then she did a check up and guessed that problem might be due to the PCOsyndromeom and gave some medicines to induce periods(dude I am just 26 not even married yet and PCOS? also my lifestyle is super healthy). By now it was 3 months without a period. My tummy was as if I was 3 months pregnant lady. also, I had put on 2.5 kgs by this time (Mind you even after doing extreme exercise)
After starting medication to induce periods, I did bleed but that was not satisfactory, after which she kept me on some oral contraceptive tablets to regularise my periods(yes contraceptives are used to regularise women periods). I was still struggling to reduce my increased weight(I am still struggling at this point in time). I was weighting for those period cramps like the way thirsty land waits for a drop of rain. I did get after a course of 21 days. again it was not that satisfying but the doctor said this is what you will get. and she suggested being on femilone for more 2 months. My knee injury still popped up randomly.
In between while doing a milage run I got hit by a car on the same knee and it started paining more. took a rest for like 5 days and again started running but no improvement, as soon as I went above 15kms my knee pain would return. I was pissed by this time and made a strong decision to give a break for my running after Ladakh marathon for at least 2 months and concentrate on recovering my pain.
Ladakh was approaching and my knee pain was not ready to shut its mouth. days went by. I arrived at Ladakh a week before the marathon and to tell you it was HAVEN on earth. I forgot all my pain. I forgot who I was. I forgot what I had come for and just soaked myself in the beauty of nature. Nature is amazing. On arrival of the first day, I was not able to breathe my oxygen level was low but yes I did start my training from the first day on words. I started with a brisk walk on uphill it was not that tiring but I was enjoying and to tell you my knee was not hurting now. Next day also I did a short run from my guest house to Shanti Stupa and back. I was so happy that yes I can give my best in this environment also. Next 3-4 days I did train myself running up and down the hill. Runners are supposed to take complete rest before 2 days of a marathon. I did same. on 7th September thought of taking some yoga because my body can never sit idle. I did around 50 Suryanakmaskara, god I should not have done this it totally gave pressure on my legs and some muscle pain came back. It was good that the next day I did not do anything and just decided to take rest on the race day morning suddenly my knee injury came back from nowhere. I was not aware of what's happening. I did my set of knee injuries and was confident that I will able to run with this set of exercises. But I was wrong when the race started I ran very fast completed some 15 km and then my knee pain started coming back. I was praying to god (God please you can give me this pain at 35 km or 40 km but not now.). But still, I was getting that terrible IT band pain. at 17.5 km something my nose started bleeding I think because of altitude difference. I just walked till the medical camp I am not sure at what km it was but first time in my entire marathon carrier I sat on the road because of terrible knee pain and nose bleeding. Nose bleeding stopped but my knee injury was not ready to give up. I was in a condition wherein I could not even walk. At that point in time, I thought my marathon career is over. I felt like crying badly. I consider myself as one of the strong person but I did cry that day not in front of other runners but. I can cry only in front of my parents and no one else. After reaching finishing point in the marathon hub first thing I went to physio but go to see there was a lot of rush. finally one of the doctors gave me some stretches and I could at least walk with that. I was not sure about the running.
Once I was done with the physiotherapist I called my dad. I could not speak anything to him there were just a big cloud or tears in my eyes and the only sound was of sobbing. My dad must have surely freaked out because I could not talk for 5 minutes properly. Finally, I controlled my self and told him that forget about getting good timings I could not even complete this time. I was heart broken completely heartbroken. In my life, I never fell in love and never did experience heart break but surely it must be this terrible, 4 months of preparations and I don't know how many people must be having hopes on me, some people had already predicted my position in the marathon and others my timing. I personally was damn confident that I will complete within 3.25 - 3.20 minutes this time. But everything went into a vein.
I will not give up but. I will rise and shine again. My motivation will never stop. Running is the sport which gave me my life. It's the sport which taught me what the hard work is and patience is It also taught me how much my dad and mom loves me It gave me exposure to so many things. But yes It also took a lot of my time in order to achieve all this.
One thing what I learned in all this circus is never expect anything from anyone not even yourself. When you expect too much and if you don't come true to the expectations its demotivating. So always be in the flow and accept whatever you get. Life is to enjoy not to cry on small things(This was for me).
Btw about my PCOS. medication is still going on if anyone has a proper cure for it and IT band syndrome than do let me know in the comments. I don't know for how long I will have to continue with the medication for PCOS but I want to get read of it as soon as possible also needs to reduce more 5 kgs ASAP.
So stay tuned for my comeback. It will be rocking.
So this failure is not a big failure compared to my past. I faced the worst failures than this. I think failure makes you stronger. This was just a failed attempt in one of the multiple races I ran in my life. So the story goes back to the time when I moved to the silicon valley of India, oh don't tell me now you don't know this place its Namma Bengaluru. Place where from far way looks as if everything is running fast but nothing runs fast not even Lamborghini. So I got a new opportunity in this city and just planned to move on with the flow. Suddenly an idea of participating in the Ladakh marathon came into my mind. I was already 3.35 finisher in Full Marathon so thought I might do my best because I had improved a lot on my half marathons. Without thinking anything I booked a ticket from Bangalore to Delhi and from Delhi to Leh. On their website, they had suggested arriving in Leh 2 weeks prior so that we can get well acclimatized. I did the same and simultaneously my preparations started. But I was not aware of the gif kept in the future. I started with the strength training in the evening and running in the morning. I applied all marathon running strategies
Milage running on weekends
Speed and alternate running on weekdays.
I would take just 1 days rest and that rest day also I would do Yoga so that I utilize myself fully.
Those were the days I was in PG. Believe me, the PG which I was staying in was one of the most horrible ones. I had just joined there because it had GYM and nothing else, Their food was worst, there was no proper space in the rooms even to move for a single person, also I met one of the stupid and irritating roommate over there who ate my energy like a zombie. I just wanted to run away from there. Finally, I found a shared apartment and was supposed to move in after a month. My preparation for the marathon was in full swing, But something was wrong. In this 2 months, I did not get my periods even once. I was concerned about it not sure what went wrong. I am not a type of a person who is in a relationship so the question of might be pregnant was out of my mind. still, I waited patiently by this time due to excessive mileage running my knee started painting terribly. I am not sure its runner's knee or ITB syndrome. I am still analyzing my knee problem and in search of a good physiotherapist. Soon it became 2.5 months without my periods, also I was putting body fat accessively even after exercising. This was really scary for me. I can tolerate anything but not putting on weight and body fat. by now reasons to get worried were piling up, ITB syndrome, periods not regular and body fat. Finally, my patience came to end and I decided to visit a doctor, a good gynecologist who will not judge me and give me good treatment.
The first question asked by a doctor when I told her my problem was Do you have a boyfriend? (She was one of the nice ladies I met) I was like If I had I would have never visited you. Then she did a check up and guessed that problem might be due to the PCOsyndromeom and gave some medicines to induce periods(dude I am just 26 not even married yet and PCOS? also my lifestyle is super healthy). By now it was 3 months without a period. My tummy was as if I was 3 months pregnant lady. also, I had put on 2.5 kgs by this time (Mind you even after doing extreme exercise)
After starting medication to induce periods, I did bleed but that was not satisfactory, after which she kept me on some oral contraceptive tablets to regularise my periods(yes contraceptives are used to regularise women periods). I was still struggling to reduce my increased weight(I am still struggling at this point in time). I was weighting for those period cramps like the way thirsty land waits for a drop of rain. I did get after a course of 21 days. again it was not that satisfying but the doctor said this is what you will get. and she suggested being on femilone for more 2 months. My knee injury still popped up randomly.
In between while doing a milage run I got hit by a car on the same knee and it started paining more. took a rest for like 5 days and again started running but no improvement, as soon as I went above 15kms my knee pain would return. I was pissed by this time and made a strong decision to give a break for my running after Ladakh marathon for at least 2 months and concentrate on recovering my pain.
Ladakh was approaching and my knee pain was not ready to shut its mouth. days went by. I arrived at Ladakh a week before the marathon and to tell you it was HAVEN on earth. I forgot all my pain. I forgot who I was. I forgot what I had come for and just soaked myself in the beauty of nature. Nature is amazing. On arrival of the first day, I was not able to breathe my oxygen level was low but yes I did start my training from the first day on words. I started with a brisk walk on uphill it was not that tiring but I was enjoying and to tell you my knee was not hurting now. Next day also I did a short run from my guest house to Shanti Stupa and back. I was so happy that yes I can give my best in this environment also. Next 3-4 days I did train myself running up and down the hill. Runners are supposed to take complete rest before 2 days of a marathon. I did same. on 7th September thought of taking some yoga because my body can never sit idle. I did around 50 Suryanakmaskara, god I should not have done this it totally gave pressure on my legs and some muscle pain came back. It was good that the next day I did not do anything and just decided to take rest on the race day morning suddenly my knee injury came back from nowhere. I was not aware of what's happening. I did my set of knee injuries and was confident that I will able to run with this set of exercises. But I was wrong when the race started I ran very fast completed some 15 km and then my knee pain started coming back. I was praying to god (God please you can give me this pain at 35 km or 40 km but not now.). But still, I was getting that terrible IT band pain. at 17.5 km something my nose started bleeding I think because of altitude difference. I just walked till the medical camp I am not sure at what km it was but first time in my entire marathon carrier I sat on the road because of terrible knee pain and nose bleeding. Nose bleeding stopped but my knee injury was not ready to give up. I was in a condition wherein I could not even walk. At that point in time, I thought my marathon career is over. I felt like crying badly. I consider myself as one of the strong person but I did cry that day not in front of other runners but. I can cry only in front of my parents and no one else. After reaching finishing point in the marathon hub first thing I went to physio but go to see there was a lot of rush. finally one of the doctors gave me some stretches and I could at least walk with that. I was not sure about the running.
Once I was done with the physiotherapist I called my dad. I could not speak anything to him there were just a big cloud or tears in my eyes and the only sound was of sobbing. My dad must have surely freaked out because I could not talk for 5 minutes properly. Finally, I controlled my self and told him that forget about getting good timings I could not even complete this time. I was heart broken completely heartbroken. In my life, I never fell in love and never did experience heart break but surely it must be this terrible, 4 months of preparations and I don't know how many people must be having hopes on me, some people had already predicted my position in the marathon and others my timing. I personally was damn confident that I will complete within 3.25 - 3.20 minutes this time. But everything went into a vein.
I will not give up but. I will rise and shine again. My motivation will never stop. Running is the sport which gave me my life. It's the sport which taught me what the hard work is and patience is It also taught me how much my dad and mom loves me It gave me exposure to so many things. But yes It also took a lot of my time in order to achieve all this.
One thing what I learned in all this circus is never expect anything from anyone not even yourself. When you expect too much and if you don't come true to the expectations its demotivating. So always be in the flow and accept whatever you get. Life is to enjoy not to cry on small things(This was for me).
Btw about my PCOS. medication is still going on if anyone has a proper cure for it and IT band syndrome than do let me know in the comments. I don't know for how long I will have to continue with the medication for PCOS but I want to get read of it as soon as possible also needs to reduce more 5 kgs ASAP.
So stay tuned for my comeback. It will be rocking.
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